Blue Underpants 5
by lambchopfan1234
Summary: Spongebob and Bessie have a battle with the wicked Wedgie Fowl. Can they win?
1. Chapter 1: Cast

**Blue Underpants and the Wrath of the Wicked Wedgie Fowl**

By: lambchopfan1234

**Chapter 1: Cast**

"Imagination is more important than knowledge."

-Albert Einstein

Harold Hutchins- Bessie Higgenbottom

George Beard- Spongebob Squarepants

Captain Underpants- Blue Underpants

Mrs. Ribble- Mrs. Fowl

Mr. Krupp- Mr. Blue

Wedgie Woman- Wedgie Fowl

Kid- Tommy Pickles (All Grown Up!)

Kid 2- Gerald (Hey Arnold!)

Miss Anthrope- Mr. Milk

Mr. Rected- Miss Gibbons

Miss Fitt- Rat Face (Fudge Books, WHICH I LUV!)

King Daddy Long Johns- King Neptune (The Spongebob Squarepants Movie)

Princess Pantyhose- Princess Venus (OC)

A/N: Ready for doom, Fanfiction friends? Get ready for wedgies!


	2. Ch 2: The Trubble About Blue Underpants

**Blue Underpants and the Wrath of the Wicked Wedgie Fowl**

By: lambchopfan1234

**Chapter 2: The Trubble With Blue Underpants**

**Bessie: **Hi everybody. Before you read this fanfic, there's some stuff you need to know.

**Spongebob: **Read this comic book to fill yourself in on the story so far. But remember: This info is **TOP-SECRET! **So don't let it fall into the wrong hands!

**The Trubble With Blue Underpants**

Now it can be told !

- A Informashonal Comic By Spongebob and Bessie

Once upon a time there were two cool kids named Spongebob and Bessie.

**Spongebob: **We kick butt.

**Bessie: **Me too.

But they had a mean principle named Mr. Blue.

**Mr. Blue: **Come over here, bubs!

**Spongebob and Bessie: **No way!

One time Spongebob and Bessie hipnotised Mr. Blue with the 3-D Hypno Ring TM (I'm sure you remember this from The Adventures of Blue Underpants).

**Spongebob: **You will obey our command.

**Mr. Blue: **O.K.

Spongebob and Bessie made him think he was a great superhero named Blue Underpants.

**Blue Underpants: **Look- I'm Blue Underpants!

**Spongebob and Bessie: **Hahaha!

It was funny at first, but then Mr. Blue jumped outta the window.

**Bessie: **Hey, where do you think your going?

**Blue Underpants: **To fight crime, O.K.?

Spongebob and Bessie had to chase after him so he would'ent get killed and hurt.

**Spongebob and Bessie: **Come over here, Bub!

**Blue Underpants: **No way!

They had many advenchures with lots of inapropreate humor.

**Blue Underpants: **Diapers and toilets and poop- oh my!

Then one day Mr. Blue askidentelly drank Super Juice.

"**Glub glub!"**

Now he gots super powers. He can fly too!

**Blue Underpants: **Tra-la-laaaaa!

Two things you have to be careful about: water and finger snaps.

H20...

"**SNAP!"**

For if you snap your fingers by Mr. Blue...

"**SNAP!"**

...He turns into Blue Underpants.

**Blue Underpants: **_(singing, flying out the window) _Tra-la-laaaa!

And if you pour water on Blue Underpantses head...

He turns back into Mr. Blue.

**Mr. Blue: **Blah blah blah!

So... if you see Mr. Blue, don't snap your fingers or youl'l be sorry.

Mr. Blue + **"SNAP!" **= Blue Underpants

And if you see Blue Underpants, don't pore no water on his head or you'll be sorryer!

Blue Underpants + H20 = Mr. Blue

Remember- This is **TOP-SECRET **so don't tell anybody!

Treedome Comix

Inc.


	3. Chapter 3: SpongeBob and Bessie

**Blue Underpants and the Wrath of the Wicked Wedgie Fowl**

By: lambchopfan1234

**Chapter 3: Spongebob and Bessie**

This is Spongebob Squarepants and Bessie Higgenbottom. Spongebob is the kid on the left with the tie and the flat-top. Bessie is the one on the right with the T-shirt and the bad haircut. Remember that now.

**PEOPLE-**

**PLEASE WEAR YOUR SOCKS ON THE GYM FLOOR**

At most schools, the teachers try to emphasize "the three **R**s" ( **R**eading, '**R**iting, and **'R**ithmetic). But Spongebob and Bessie's teacher Mrs. Fowl was more concerned with enforcing what she called "the three **S**s) (**S**it down, **S**hut your pie holes, and **S**TOP DRIVING ME CRAZY!)

While this was unfortunate for all of her students, it was especially bad for Spongebob and Bessie, because they were very imaginative kids.

You see, imagination was not really encouraged at Spongebob and Bessie's school—in fact, it was discouraged. "Imagination" would only get you a one-way ticket to the principal's office.

This was sad for Spongebob and Bessie, because they didn't get straight A's, they weren't sports stars, and they could barely walk down the hallway without getting into trouble...

**PL GO**

**PE - WEA**

**ON YOU**

**SOCK**

**WA**

**PleasE Go PeE-Pee**

**On Your**

**Socks fOr**

**Warmth**

**Y LOL**

...See what I mean?

But Spongebob and Bessie had one thing that most of the other folks at Bikini Sans Elementary school didn't have: _Imagination_. They were _full _of it! And one day they would use that imagination to save the entire human race from being overthrown by a crazed woman with even crazier super powers.

But before I can tell you that story, I have to tell you _this _story...


	4. Chapter 4: Mrs Fowl's Big News

**Blue Underpants and the Wrath of the Wicked Wedgie Fowl**

By: lambchopfan1234

**Chapter 4: Mrs. Fowl's Big News**

One fine day, Spongebob and Bessie's homeroom teacher, Mrs. Fowl. "I have some bad news: I'm retiring."

"Hooray!" cried the children.

"_Not today!" _snapped Mrs. Fowl. "At the end of the school year!"

"Aww, _maaaan," _moaned the children.

"But the staff is throwing a retirment party for me today..." said Mrs. Fowl.

"Hooray!" cried the children.

"...during recess," said Mrs. Fowl.

"Aww, _maaaan," _moaned the children.

"There will be lots of free ice cream!" said Mrs. Fowl.

"Hooray!" cried the children.

"My favorite flavor: _chunky tofu!" _said Mrs. Fowl.

"Aw, _maaaan," _moaned the children.

"But first," siad Mrs. Fowl, "it's time for something fun!"

"Hooray!" cried the children.

"You all get to make 'Happy Retirement' cards for me!" said Mrs. Fowl.

"Aww, _maaaan," _moaned the children.


	5. Chapter 5: WYCETSTVB

**Blue Underpants and the Wrath of the Wicked Wedgie Fowl**

By: lambchopfan1234

**Chapter 5: When You Care Enough to Send the Very Best**

Mrs. Fowl went around the classroom handing out envelopes, sheets of construction paper, and butterfly stencils to all of the children. Then she wrote a poem on the chalkboard.

"Alright, take out your crayons," sad Mrs. Fowl harshly. "I want you to use stencils to make a yellow butterfly on the front of your cards. When you're done, copy this poem on the inside."

Roses are Red,

Violets are Blue,

You are retiring

And we'll miss you.

Signed,

Your Name Here

"Can we make up our own poems?" asked Jimmy Neutron.

"_No!" _snapped Mrs. Fowl.

"Do we have to use stencils?" asked Sweet Cheeks (OC).

"YES!" yelled Mrs. Fowl.

"Can we make our butterflies purple?" asked Donny.

"_NO!" _yelled Mrs. Fowl. "Butterflies are yellow! Everybody knows that!"

While the rest of the class worked on their cards, Spongebob and Bessie had a better idea.

"Let's make Mrs. Fowl a comic book instead!" said Spongebob.

"Yeah!" said Bessie. "We can make it all about her! It'll be cool!"

So that's just what they did.


	6. XTRA COMIX: Blue Underpants 5

**Blue Underpants and the Wrath of the Wicked Wedgie Fowl**

By: lambchopfan1234

**Chapter 6: X-TRA COMIX #9: Blue Underpants and the Wrath of the Wicked Wedgie Fowl (Comic)**

By **Spongebob Squarepants**

And **Bessie Higgenbottom**

BLUE

UNDERPANTS

And the WRATH of the

WICKED WEDGIE FOWL

Story by Spongebob Squarepants – Pictures by Bessie Higgenbottom

Onse upon a time there was a really mean teacher named Mrs. Fowl who was very mean.

**Mrs. Fowl: **GRRRRR... I am evil!

She gave us lots of homework and yelled at us all the time.

**Mrs. Fowl: **Read 250 pages for a test!

**Kids: **Oh crap.

One time at Chrismas vacashion she gave everybody 41 book reports.

**Mrs. Fowl: **Ho ho ho!

"**DEC. 25..."**

**Jack Fenton: **Wake up... It's time to open up your presints!

**Danny: **I cant! I half to do my homework!

After Chrismas everybody turned in a big pile of book reports.

**Mrs. Fowl: **Haw haw haw!

Then something terible happened.

"**CRASH!"**

**Mrs. Fowl: **Help!

Mrs. Fowl was baried in a mounten of book reports.

**Tommy: **She's really most sinserly dead.

**Doctor Hibbert: **No she's not. We can rebuild her...

Doctor is up here.

We can make here better than she was. ...Faster... Stronger... EVILER!

Her bionic ponytail hairdoo opened up to reveal a evil wedgie Robo-Claw!

**Inosent Bystander (Tommy): **_(getting a wedgie) _Ouchies!

**Wedgie Fowl: **Haw haw nobody can stop me now!

**Gerald: **Help! Wedgie Fowl is in the teachers lounge. She just drank all the coffee and now shes giving the gym teacher a killer-wedgie!

**Principal Puff: **Oh, the horror! She better make a fresh pot! This looks like a job for...

**Students: **BLUE UNDERPANTS!

"**CRASH!"**

**Blue Underpants: **What's the problem, bub?

**Principal Puff: **Help, it's Wedgie Fowl!

So Blue Underpants had a big fight with Wedgie Fowl. She tried to give him a wedgie but...

Blue Underpants was faster than a speeding waistband...

"**Zip!"**

More powerful than boxer shorts...

"**Pow!"**

**Wedgie Fowl: **Ouch.

And abel to leap tall bildings without getting a wedgie.

**Blue Underpants: **Tra-La-Laaaaa!

**Wedgie Fowl: **Oh crap.

So Wedgie Fowl went to the store to by some spray starch.

**NEW**

**SPRAY STARCH**

Warning: Do not spray this product on your underwear or you'll be sorry.

**Wedgie Fowl: **Starch is the enemy of underwear!

Wedgie Fowl sprayed.

**Wedgie Fowl: **Gotcha!

"**SSSSS!"**

**Blue Underpants: **Hey! Oh no! My underpants is all stiff and uncomfertable!

**Wedgie Fowl: **Haw haw!

Blue Underpants tried to push the buttons on his utility waistband, but they were broke! He was powerless!

**Blue Underpants: I'M DOOMED!**

Wedgie Fowl gave Blue Underpants a BIG wedgie...

Then she hung him from a pole.

**Wedgie Fowl: **Nobody can stop me now!

**Blue Underpants: **Oh crap.

Soon some kids came by.

**Tommy: **Blue Underpants needs our help!

So they threw him a rope.

**Gerald: **Catch!

Then they pulled real hard.

And let go.

"**BOING!"**

"**SPLASH!"**

The kids pored fabric softener in the pool.

Suddenly the starch got washed away. **HOORAY!**

**Blue Underpants: **My underpants is soft and cottony onse again!

**Kids: **Hollylooya!

**Blue Underpants: **Thanks kids.

**Kids: **No problemo.

Soon Blue Underpants found Wedgie Fowl.

**Blue Underpants: **Remember me?

**Wedgie Fowl: **Get him Robo-Claw.

He flew up...

**Wedgie Fowl: **It's wedgie time!

...And looped around.

The Robo-Claw reached for underwear... but it grabbed the wrong pair.

**Wedgie Fowl: **Owie wowie!

**Blue Underpants: **It's off to jail with you!

**Wedgie Fowl: **Oh crap.

**Blue Underpants: **Tra-la-laaaaa!

**Kids: **Hooray!

**THE END**


	7. Chapter 7: The Wrath of Mrs Fowl

**Blue Underpants and the Wrath of the Wicked Wedgie Fowl**

By: lambchopfan1234

**Chapter 7: The Wrath of Mrs. Fowl**

A/N: Any simalarities to actual persons (living or dead) is very, very unforchenate.

Treedome Comix,

Inc.

When Mrs. Fowl read the comic book that Spongebob and Bessie had made, she was furious.

"Kids!" she yelled. "You just earned a one-way ticket to the principal's office!"

"But all we did was use our imaginations!" said Spongebob.

"You're not allowed to do that in this school!" snapped Mrs. Fowl. "Didn't you read chapter 3?"

Spongebob and Bessie gathered their things and soon they were sitting in the office outside Mr. Blue's door.

"Mr. Blue is on the phone," said the school secretary, Mr. Milk. "Why don't you boys make yourselves useful and copy the 'Friday Memo' for me! You can pass them out to all the classrooms before I go to lunch."

"Oh, crap!" said Spongebob.

"_Quit your whining, buster!" _shouted Mrs. Fowl. "I want this done by the time I get back, or you'll _both _be sorry!" Mr. Milk grabbed his coat and stomped out the door.

**Bikini Sans Elementary School**

**Friday Memo**

Next Week's News:

**Monday: **Band Practice Cancelled.

No practice to day due to abestos removal in gymnasium.

**Tuesday: **SCHOOL SPIRIT DAY! Show your school spirit by wearing the school colors (blue and yellow).

**Wednesday: **CHEERLEADER TRYOUTS TODAY:

Anyone who wants to join the cheerleading squad must do all of the following:

Meet in the gym after school.

Have the school cheer memorized.

Don't forget to wear gym shoes

**Thursday: **FOOTBALL PRACTICE RE-SCHEDULED

All football players report to the soccer field for early practice—_today only_.

Pep Rally 3:15 in the gym.

**Friday: **YEARBOOK PHOTOS TAKEN TODAY:

(Please dress appropriately!) Anyone caught making "funny" faces will receive a detention.

Spongebob and Bessie looked at the "Friday Memo." It was a weekly newspaper that told all about the events of the coming week.

"Hey," said Spongebob. "Mister Milk's computer is still on. Y'wanna make a few changes to this newsletter?"

"Why not?" said Bessie.

**Friday Memo**

**Next Week's News:**

**Monday: **SCHOOL CANCELLED:

No classes today due to lack of interest.

**Tuesday: **NATIONAL WEAR YOUR PAJAMAS TO SCHOOL AND PICK YOUR NOSE DAY!

Show you care by wearing your pajamas to school (and picking your nose).

**Wednesday: **CHEERLEADER TRYOUTS TODAY:

Anyone wishing to join the cheerleading squad must do all of the following:

Eat ten whole cloves of raw garlic.

Draw a mustache on your face with permanent markers.

Tape a three-day-old egg-salad sandwich to your head.

**Thursday: **FOOTBALL PRACTICE RE-SCHEDULED

All football players report to the teachers lounge for early practice.

Food Fight 12:15 in the lunchroom

**Friday: **YEARBOOK PHOTOS TAKEN TODAY:

(Please wear Bumblebee costumes).

Also, whoever makes the funniest face wins a free pizza party for their class.

So Spongebob and Bessie typed up their own version of the "Bikini Sans Elementary Friday Memo." Then they ran off copies for all the students in the school.


	8. Chapter 8: The Retirement Card

**Blue Underpants and the Wrath of the Wicked Wedgie Fowl**

By: lambchopfan1234

**Chapter 8: The Retirement Card**

Spongebob and Bessie were gathering their new-and-improved "Friday Memo" copies into small piles when Principal Blue came into the office.

"_Hey!" _Mr. Blue shouted. "What do you two troublemakers think you're doing in here?"

"Mr. Milk told us to pass the 'Friday Memo' out to all the classrooms," said Spongebob innocently.

"Well, make it snappy!" yelled Principal Blue.

Suddenly, Bessie got a sneaky idea. She took out the blank piece of construction paper that Mrs. Fowl had given her earlier.

"Hey, Mr. Blue," said Bessie, "will you sign this retirement card for our teacher?"

Mr. Blue grabbed the card from Bessie and eyed it suspiciously.

"This card is _blank!" _Mr. Blue growled.

"I know," said Bessie. "Our class is gonna decorate it later. We wanted you to be the first to sign it."

"Well, alright then," said Mr. Blue. He opened the card and quickly scribbled

_Signed, Mr. Blue (pawprint)_

on the inside. Then he stormed outta the office.

**MiNDLESS**

**CONFORMITY**

**It's Cool—It's Fun**

**Girl: **Be just like everybody else!

**Boy: **Individuality causes pain!

"What are you gonna do with that?" asked Spongebob.

"You'll see," said Bessie, smiling.


	9. Chapter 9: Reverse Psychology

**Blue Underpants and the Wrath of the Wicked Wedgie Fowl**

By: lambchopfan1234

**Chapter 9: Reverse Psychology**

Spongebob and Bessie passed out the "Friday Memo" and made it back to the classroom just in time for Mrs. Fowl's retirement party. Spongebob quickly changed the sign outside the door, while Bessie wrote a special greeting on Mr. Blue's card and stuffed it in the envelope.

Have a Blissfully **Grand Retirement **Mrs. Fowl

Mrs. Fowl

**Re**ally **Ne**e**d**s

A B**reat**h

**M**i**nt**

"_HEY, BUBS!" _shouted Mr. Blue as he stormed down the hall. "What do you kids think you're doing?"

"We're going to Mrs. Fowl's retirement party," said Spongebob.

"That's what _YOU _think Smartbob!" said Mr. Blue. "Mrs. Fowl showed me that comic book you kids made about her. And now I catch you changing the letters on another sign! You kids aren't going to any party... you're gonna go STRAIGHT to the detention room!"

"Well _fine," _said Bessie. "Then we're not gonna give Mrs. Fowl the card our class made for her!"

Mr. Blue quickly swiped the card out of Bessie's hand.

"A-HA!" he shouted. "I'm gonna make SURE she gets this card! I'm gonna give it to here _MYSELF!"_

"Aww, _maaaan_!" said Bessie.

"**SWIPE!"**

Spongebob and Bessie walked down the hallway toward the detention room.

"Wow," said Spongebob. "That was pretty cool how you got Mr. Blue to deliver that phony card for you."

"Yep," said Bessie. "I used _reverse psycology _on him!"

"I've gotta try that sometime," said Spongebob. "By the way, what did you write on that card?"

"You'll see," said Bessie, smiling.


	10. Chapter 10: The Party

**Blue Underpants and the Wrath of the Wicked Wedgie Fowl**

By: lambchopfan1234

**Chapter 10: The Party**

Mrs. Fowl's retirement party started off bad, and it just got worse. First, Mrs. Fowl forced the class to sing a corny song to her. By the time she was done yelling at the boys for singing off-key, the chunky tofu ice cream had melted.

Everybody had to eat it anyway.

We Love Mrs. Fowl

Written and Arranged by Mrs Fowl

Kids: _**We love Mrs. Fowl**_

_**Oh yes we do.**_

_**We don't love anyone**_

_**As much as you.**_

_**When you retire,**_

_**We'll miss you.**_

_**Oh, Mrs. Fowl,**_

_**We love you!**_

Then the children handed in their "Happy Retirement" cards. Mrs. Fowl ripped several of the cards up because some of the children had mistakenly drawn polka-dots on their butterflies. One unfortunate boy had also drawn a happy "smiling" sunshine on his card, and he had to stand n the corner.

Finally, Mr. Blue stepped forward and handed Mrs. Fowl the card he had snatched from Bessie's hand.

"I went to a lot of trouble to get this for you," Mr. Blue said gallantly.

Mrs. Fowl tore the envelope open, and read the card out loud:

"You're One _Hot Mama!" _said Mrs. Fowl, with a shocked look on her face.

"Eeeeeeeeeeew!" cried the children.

Will you marry me?

Signed, Mr. Blue

She opened the card and read the inside.

"Will you marry me? Signed, Mr. Blue."

"!" cried the children. The teachers gasped. Then the room grew silent. Mrs. Fowl glared over at Mr. Blue, who had turned bright red and begans sweating profusly.

He tried to speak. He tried to tell her it was all a big mistake. He tried to say SOMETHING... but all that came out was "B-b-bubba bobba hobhobba-hobba Wah-wah."

"Er, ummm, _congrats," _said Mr. Lancer, as he patted Mr. Blue's sweaty, shivering shoulder.

"Yes! CONGRATS!" shouted Mr. Milk. "This will be the best wedding in the whole world! We can have it here in the school... a week from Saturday! I'll plan everything! You lovebirds don't have to worry about a thing!"

"Er-uh,... great... thanks," said Mrs. Fowl, still looking quite angry and confused.

"B-b-bubba hob-hobba-hobba Wah-wah," said Mr. Blue.

A/N: Oh, no! Looks like two meanies are gonna get married! That means... DOUBLE MEANIE MARRY!

"B-b-bubba bobba hob-hobba-hobby Wah-wah." LOL (Laugh Out Loud, My Pretties!)


	11. Chapter 11: Freaky Weeky

**Blue Underpants and the Wrath of the Wicked Wedgie Fowl**

By: lambchopfan1234

**Chapter 11: Freaky Weeky**

The following week at Bikini Sans Elementary School was definitely one of the weirdest ones they'd had for a while. For example: None of the kids showed up for school on Monday. But Mr. Blue didn't ever seem to notice.

"Hey, where is everybody today?" asked Miss Gibbons.

"B-b-bubba bobba hob-hobba-hobba Wah-wah," said Mr. Blue.

On Tuesday everybody did show up... in their pajamas!

"Why is everybody picking their noses?" asked Mrs. Teacher (Angelica and Suzie's Preschool Daze)

"B-b-bubba bobba hob-hobba-hobba Wah-wah," said Mr. Blue.

On Wednesday for some strange reason, the whole school smelled like garlic and rotten egg-salad sandwiches (especially some of the girls).

"Boy," said Mrs. Ugly, "the styles today sure are getting bizarre."

"B-b-bubba bobba hob-hobba-hobba Wah-wah," said Mr. Blue.

Thursday was, without a doubt, a complete and total disaster.

"_There's a food fight in the lunchroom!" _shouted Mr. Cleanunworthy (OC). "And the football team is destroy the teacher's lounge!"

"B-b-bubba bobba hob-hobba-hobba Wah-wah," said Mr. Blue.

Now, _nobody _was sure what happened on Friday. Apparently there was a mix-up with the dress-up code and the yearbook photos.

"Our school pictures are RUINED!" shouted Danny (from JusSonic (Sonic About the Food Jus!)'s Danny Phantom and the Raiders of the Lost Box).

"B-b-bubba hobba hob-hobba-hobba Wah-wah," said Mr. Blue.

Yes, it was a freaky week, alright. But the big wedding was about a day away... and things were about to get REALLY freaky!


	12. Chapter 12: The Big Wedding

**Blue Underpants and the Wrath of the Wicked Wedgie Fowl**

By: lambchopfan1234

**Chapter 12: The Big Wedding**

It was Saturday, the day of the big wedding. Mr. Milk, true to his word, had taken care of everything. In just 1 week, he had transformed the gymnasium into a beautiful wedding hall, complete with food, decorations, and even a 6-foot-tall ice sculpture.

All of the children were dressed in their finest clothes. (Bessie even wore a tie!).

"Man," said Spongebob, "I can't believe we have to go to school on _SATURDAY!"_

"I know," said Bessie. "Why couldn't they have had this wedding during Monday's math test?"

Soon the organist began to play. The rabbi walked down the aisle. He approached Spongebob and Bessie and stopped to talk to the kids.

"I've heard a lot about you 2," said the rabbi, "and I don't want you kids playing any of your tricks today."

"Silly Rabbi," said Spongebob, "tricks are for kids!"

Believe it or not, Spongebob and Bessie had not planned any pranks for the big wedding. They had no "Joy Buzzers" up their sleeves..no squirting flowers in their lapels...and no whoopee cushions on their chairs. They were in their best behavior. Nothing could go wrong today!

In no time at all, Mrs. Fowl and Mr. Blue were standing in front of the rabbi, looking quite ill. The rabbi asked Mr. Blue if he would take Mrs. Fowl to be his lawfully wedded wife.

"B-b-bubba bobba hob-hobba-hobba Wah-wah," said Mr. Blue.

Then the rabbi asked Mrs. Fowl is she would take Mr. Blue to be her husband.

There was a long silence. Everyone leaned forward. Mrs. Fowl looked nervously from side to side.

Suddenly, she shoutted out at the top of her lungs, _"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"_

Mrs. Fowl turned to Mr. Blue and jabbed her finger in his shoulder. "Listen, Blue," she said. "I _can't _marry you."

"Hooray!-er, I mean-_aww, that's too bad!" _said Mr. Blue.

"You're a mean, cruel, and vicious puppy," said Mrs. Fowl, "and I respect that. It's just... It's just..."

"Just what?" asked Mr. Blue.

"It's just you're a _puppy!" _said Mrs. Fowl. "You've got the most _rediculous _skin color—I've never seen anything quite like it! I couldn't marry a girl puppy!"

Mr. Blue got angry. "Well _fine!" _he shouted. "I didn't wanna marry you anyway! It was all SpongeBob and Bessie's fault. They _tricked _us!"

Suddenly, everybody in the gymnasium looked at Spongebob and Bessie.

"Time to go," said Spongebob.


	13. Chapter 13: The Refreshments

**Blue Underpants and the Wrath of the Wicked Wedgie Fowl**

By: lambchopfan1234

**Chapter 13: The Refreshments**

As Spongebob and Bessie turned to leave the gymnasium, they heard the loud thumps of cleated wedding boots clomping down the hall toward them.

"I'M GONNA GRIND THOSE KIDS INTO HEAD CHEESE!" screamed Mrs. Fowl as she lunged for the kids.

Spongebob and Bessie screamed and ran to the back of the room near the refreshments. There they hid behind two large wooden pillars.

Mrs. Fowl approached the pillars and grasped them with her mighty hands. With a horrible roar, she pushed the right pillar over. It landed on the back of the luncheon table, causing it to flip in the air. Unfortunately, this sent all of the food flying into the crowd.

The creamy candied carrots clobbered the kindergarteners. The fatty fried fish flipped onto the 1st Graders. The Sweet-N-Sour Speghetti Squash splattered the 2nd Graders. 3000 thawing thimbleberries thudded the 3rd Graders. 500 frosted fudgy fruitcakes flogged the 4th Graders. And 55 fistfuls of fancy French-fried frankfurters flattened the 5th Graders.

By now you're probably worried that the wedding guests had nothing to drink with their lovely appetizers. Well, rest assured, the 2nd pillar took care of that. Mrs. Fowl pushed the left pillar into the fresh fruit display, causing it to topple over, sending two large watermelons crashing into two oversized punch bowls. This created 2 enormous splashes of tropical fruit-flavored punch, which rained down upon the wedding guests like a torrental downpour.

Now, no wedding is complete without a wedding cake. And when Mrs. Fowl kicked the ice-sculpture over, the resulting crash sent the beautiful double-deckered "Moon Cake" flipping high into the air, right over Mrs. Fowl's head.

"I'VE GOT YA NOW!" screamed Mrs. Fowl, as she grabbed Spongebob and Bessie by their neckties.

"**SPLAT!"**

Spongebob undid his tie, Bessie took off her pearls, and they ran outta the gymnasium screaming.

"Woman," cried Bessie. "I thought we were dead meat!"

"That's what we get for going to school on Saturday!" said Spongebob.

A/N I'm...a...a... NEN!: Looks like a bad sign. But... A sign for WHAT?


	14. Chapter 14: Fowl's Revenge

**Blue Underpants and the Wrath of the Wicked Wedgie Fowl**

By: lambchopfan1234

**Chapter 14: Bad Sign 2: Fowl's Revenge**

As you might imagine, Spongebob and Bessie were nervous about going back to class on Monday. But for some strange reason Mrs. Fowl seemed happy to see them.

"Good morning, kids," Mrs. Fowl chirped with a giant, evil toothy grin. "Come here... I've got something to show you!"

"Uh-oh," said Spongebob. "She's smiling—that can't be a good sign!"

Spongebob and Bessie cautiously approached Mrs. Fowl's desk.

"I took the liberty of adjusting your grades last weekend," said Mrs. Fowl. "You'll be happy to know that all your grades have just been dropped from B's and C's to _F's and G's."_

"Oh, _NO!" _Spongebob gasped. "Not _F's and G's! _...Hey, what's a G?"

"It's the only grade _lower _than an _F!" _said Mrs. Fowl.

"There's no such grade as a G," said Bessie.

"There is now, Bubbie!" said Mrs. Fowl. "Looks like you two are gonna _FLUNK _the FOURTH GRADE! Won't that be fun?"

"No way," said Spongebob. _"That's not fair!"_

"Life isn't fair," said Mrs. Fowl. "Get used to it!"

Okay, here's some obvious refrences from The Adventures of Blue Underpants and this chapter.

The "It's A Bird, It's A Plane... IT'S AN EGG SALAD SANDWICH!" joke is an obvious refrence to Superman.

Blue Underpants and the Attack of the Talking Supertoilets Reference was from lambchopfan1234's mind! 

Mixed Nut (...And Bolts!) is based on the snack Mixed Nuts.

Boomer the Purple Singing Dragon is a parody of Barney the Purple Dragon.

The grade _G _is a reference to some colleges (DON'T GO THOSE COLLEGES! STAY AT THE OTHERS!)


	15. Chapter 15: A Bad Idea

**Blue Underpants and the Wrath of the Wicked Wedgie Fowl**

By: lambchopfan1234

**Chapter 15: A Bad Idea**

That afternoon, Spongebob and Bessie sat in their tree house feeling sorry for themselves.

"She can't get away with that," said Spongebob. "We've gotta tell somebody about this."

"Nobody's gonna believe us," said Bessie.

"Well, there is _one _thing we could do," said Spongebob. He opened the door to their drawing table and searched through the pennies, paper clips, dried spitballs, and rubber bands. Then he pulled out a dused plastic ring with some gum stuck on it. It was the 3-D Hypno-Ring.

"Oh, no!" said Bessie. "I thought we threw that thing away!"

"We just threw the instructions away," said Spongebob. "But I remember how it works."

"Do you _remember _what happened the LAST TIME WE USED IT?" asked Bessie.

"Yeah," said Spongebob. "But we were fooling around last time. This time we'll be serious. We won't make any mistakes! All we have to do is hypnotize her into changing our grades back to normal. That's all!"

"I don't know..." said Bessie. "It sounds like a bad idea to me!"

"Worse than _FLUNKING _the 4th Grade?" asked Spongebob.

"Good point," said Bessie.

A/N: Okay, looks like the THIRD bad sign! Anyway, I'm writing a live-action movie called "Peanuts" which will be directed by John Davis when I grow up.

Anyways...

The 3-D Hypno Ring is from The Adventures of Blue Underpants.

In the last time they used it, they turned Mr. Blue into Blue Underpants.

Meanwhile, Triple R. (Read, Review, and Request)


	16. Ch 16: The Return of the 3D Hypno Ring

**Blue Underpants and the Wrath of the Wicked Wedgie Fowl**

By: lambchopfan1234

A/N: Sorry for the hold-up, folks. I was taking care of my new pet turtle, Mertle. She's only a baby, 2 inches long, and LOVES AND IS SCARED of me. SHE'S PERFECTOMUNDO!

**Chapter 16: The Return of the 3-D Hypno Ring**

The next day at school, Spongebob and Bessie stayed behind while the rest of the class went outside for recess.

"What are you mindless idiots still doing here?" asked Mrs. Fowl.

"Ummmm," said Spongebob nervously. "Er, we wanted to show you this really cool ring."

"Yeah," Bessie said. "If you look closely at it, you can see a funny picture."

"Well, hold it still," said Mrs. Fowl, as she stared at the ring intently.

"I have to move it back & forth," said Spongebob, "otherwise you won't be able to see the picture."

Mrs. Fowl's eyes following the ring back and forth... back and forth... back and forth... back and forth...

"You are getting sleepy," said Spongebob.

"Veeery sleepy," said Bessie.

Mrs. Fowl yawned. Her eyes began to droop.

"I'mmssooosleeeeeeepyyy," she said, as she slowly closed her eyes.

"In a moment," said Spongebob, "I will snap your fingers. Then you will be hypnotised.

"," mumbled Mrs. Fowl.

_SNAP!_

"Now..." said Bessie, "you must listen very..."

**Chapter 16 ½: We Interrupt This Chapter To Bring You This Important Message**

"Hello, world! This is Doofus Hamsterfanny... er, I mean this is Perch Perkins reporting for Eyewitness News. We have a late-breaking story about a tragic incident this is now occuring in the Pacific Northwest.

"Police have just closed down the Li'l Wiseguy Novelty Company in Toota-Toota, Fudgington. Apparently, this company has been selling very dangerous 'Hypno-Rings.' We now take you live, via satellite to our reporter, Flunky Toiletchunks, er, I mean Kent Brockman, with the latest developments.

"**EYEWITNESS**

**4NEWS"**

"**LI'L WISEGUY**

**NOVELTY COMPANY**

"We're Stinkers!""

Police Line- Do Not Cross – Police Line

"Thanks, Doofus," said Kent.

"Reports have pulled in from all across the country concerning children who have used the '3-D Hypno-Ring' on their friends and family with disasterous results. But the most shocking revelation is the effect that rings seem to have on _women._

"Apparently, whenever the ring is used to hypnotize a woman, a mental blunder occurs, causing the woman to have an OPPOSITE reaction, but they are very concerned. If you or someone you love has purchased a '3-D Hypno-Ring,' throw it away at once. And whatever you do, PLEASE DON'T USE IT ON A WOMAN!"

**Chapter 16 ¾: We Now Return To Our Regularly Scheduled Chapter (Already In Progress...)**

"...and when we snap our fingers," Spongebob continued, "you will change our grades back to normal."

"Yeah," said Bessie. "And you won't do anything crazy, like turn into _Wedgie Fowl."_

"And you won't try to destroy Blue Underpants," said Spongebob, "or take over the world, either."

"Right!" said Bessie. "You'll just change our grades, and that's it!"

"**SNAP!"**

Spongebob and Bessie looked nervously at each other.

"Well," said Spongebob, "I think that covers everything."

"Yep," said Bessie. "We shouldn't have any more problems from Mrs. Fowl."

So the kids snapped their fingers.

_SNAP!_


	17. Chapter 17: Bad Hair Night

**Blue Underpants and the Wrath of the Wicked Wedgie Fowl**

By: lambchopfan1234

**Chapter 17: Bad Hair Night**

That night, Bessie and Spongebob camped out in Spongebob's treedome.

"I have to drive your mother to work early tomorrow morning," said Rupert Squarepants, Spongebob's dad. "So you kids are responsible for getting yourselves to school on time."

"O.K., Pop," said Spongebob.

"We'll be there bright and early, Rupert," said Bessie.

It had been a tough day for Spongebob and Bessie, and now it was time to relax. Spongebob rolled out the sleeping bags, while Bessie unpacked a box of Donettes (from Hostess, I've heard of them, but I've NEVER tried one, and I think it fits that fact that Bessie's a girl), a four-pack of orange soda (which she stole from Kel, due to the fact that they both like orange soda), and a big bowl of Bar-B-Q Potato Chips. Believe it or not, there was a cool Japanese monster movie on TV called Reptar: The Movie.

"You know," said Spongebob, "life doesn't get any better than this!"

"Yep," said Bessie. "But do you think the hypno-ring actually worked on Mrs. Fowl? She looked a little weird when she came out of her trance."

"Aaah," she was probably just sleepy," said Spongebob. "Teachers have very stressful jobs, you know."

"I wonder why?" said Bessie.

After watching Reptar: The Movie, Spongebob and Bessie brushed the crumbs out of their sleeping bags and got ready for bed.

"Let's sleep in our school clothes tonight," said Spongebob. "That way we won't get up early to get dressed."

"Good idea," said Bessie.

So Spongebob turned out the light, and soon the two kids were drifting off to sleep. After a few minutes, Bessie sat up quickly and looked around.

"Hey!" she whispered. "What's that noise?"

"I didn't hear anything," said Spongebob.

They listened closely.

"Shh!" said Bessie. "There it is again!"

Spongebob heard it this time. He reached over and opened the three house door a crack. All they could hear was the sound of crickets chirping in the night. Spongebob opened the door wider, and the kids peeked down.

"AAAUUGH!" roared an evil-looking woman dressed in tight purple vinyl and a mangy-looking fake-fur boa.

Spongebob and Bessie screamed in horror!

The snarling woman climbed the ladder into the tree house. Spongebob and Bessie recognized her immediately in the moonlight.

"Mrs. Fowl," Spongebob gasped. "What a lovely, uh, _outfit _you have on."

"Who's Mrs. Fowl?" the angry lady growled. "My name is _Wedgie Fowl!"_

Spongebob and Bessie looked at each other and swallowed hard.

"I understand that you kids have information about Blue Underpants," said Wedgie Fowl.

"What makes you say that?" asked Bessie.

"I've read your comic books," said the evil villian. "You kids know his strengths, his weaknesses, and I bet you even know his SECRET IDENTITY!"

"No way!" said Spongebob. "Blue Underpants isn't real... He's-he's a fanfic character!"

"We'll see about that," Wedgie Fowl scoffed.

Wedgie Fowl reached out and grasped Spongebob and Bessie's arms.

"What do we do now?" cried Bessie.

"We can take 'er," said Spongebob. "It's not like she has superpowers or anything!"

A/N: Oh, no! THIS is what the bad signs led to! AN EVIL INVASION BY A WEDGIE-MAKING EVIL WOMAN! Help! Help! She's giving the writer a Wedgie right now! Hmmm... Blue Underpants has to save the day!

WF/R: He never will!

A/R: Oh, crap. Looks like it's a KILLER WEDGIE!

WF/R: Of course it is, you stupid joke!

A/N#2: Rupert Squarepants was from _The Rugrats Movie Nicktoons Style, _by dannyfangirl.

_Donettes _are from the Hostess company, which I saw in a Citgo on Thursday, July something, 2010.

The _Orange Soda Stealing _term belongs to Kenan & Kel (TV Series)

_Reptar: The Movie _was based on the Rugrats episode _Scary Movie, Season 1 _of Rugrats. Watch the trailer on YouTube.

The 3-D Hypno-Ring was from The Adventures of Blue Underpants by lambchopfan1234

Doofus Hamsterfanny and Flunky Toiletchunks are from Blue Underpants and the Perilous Plot of Professor Calamitous by lambchopfan1234.

Li'l Wiseguy is from The Adventures of Blue Underpants by lambchopfan1234

Toot-Toot, Fudgington is from Double Fudge, my favorite book from when...

"So, Fudgie, how was Washington?" asked Sheila.

"You mean _Fudgington?" _asked Fudge.


	18. Who's Afraid of the Big Bad Pony?

**Blue Underpants and the Wrath of the Wicked Wedgie Fowl**

By: lambchopfan1234

Resumed Because: I don't understand a line in Rugrats Nicktoon Style

**Chapter 17: Who's Afraid of the Big Bad Pony?**

The struggle that followed may someday be remembered as the single most unlucky thing that ever happened in the history of Nickelodeon.

First, Spongebob pulled his arm out of Wedgie Fowl's grasp. Then Bessie squirmed away, too. When Wedgie Fowl lunged after them, Spongebob crouched down into a ball behind Wedgie Fowl's feet. All it took was a simple nudge from Bessie to send the ferocious female toppling over backward…

In the picture, Bessie pushed Wedgie Fowl as Spongebob, in a ball, kicked Wedgie Fowl, making Wedgie Fowl fall into the You-Know-What.

…right into the wall. KLUNK! The bookshelf above Wedgie Fowl's head shook violently, causing a strange-looking juice carton to topple over. Suddenly, a stream of glowing green juice poured out of the carton, directly into the tightly-woven ponytail of hair atop Wedgie Fowl's head.

In the picture, the juice fell on Wedgie Fowl's head. Making her… Bessie put the juice on the shelf… WICKED WEDGIE FOWL!

"NOOO!" yelled Bessie as she grabbed the juice carton. "This is the juice we got from that spaceship back in the third fanfic!"

"You mean the one with the annoyingly long title?" asked Spongebob.

"Yeah!" said Bessie. "This is Extra-Strength Super Power Juice! And a whole bunch of it got in her hair!"

"Don't worry," said Spongebob. "None of it got in her mouth. What's the worst thing that could happen? Her _hairstyle _would have super powers?"

"Well," said Bessie, "I guess you're right. That _is _pretty stupid… even for one of _our _stories!"

"It's pretty funny, though," said Spongebob.

Suddenly, two coiled arms of twisting hair shot out of Wedgie Fowl's head and grabbed Spongebob and Bessie by the back of their underpants, yanking them high in the sky.

"You know," said Spongebob, "this isn't as funny as I thought it would be."

In the picture, Wedgie Fowl had her hands clenched evilly as Spongebob and Bessie are high in the sky.


End file.
